來,改變自己!

星期六晚聽港台「你得我都得」,李燦榮提到刻在西敏寺某不知名主教的墓誌銘,對我啟發很大

(此圖非本文提到的墓誌銘)


When I was young and free and my imagination had no limits, I dreamed of changing the world.

As I grew older and wiser, I discovered the world would not change, so I shortened my sights somewhat and decided to change only my country. But it too seemed immovable.

As I grew into my twilight years, in one desperate attempt, I settled for changing only my family, those closest to me, but alas, they would have none of it.

And now as I lay on my deathbed, I suddenly realize if only I had changed myself first, then by my example I would have changed my family. From their inspiration and encouragement, I would have been able to better my country and who knows, I may have even changed the world.”

(中文譯本:老編西歪 : 西敏寺大教堂的著名墓碑銘文 [勵志文章])


躺在床上垂危的主教發現,憑個人力量,不要說改變世界,就連改變自己的家人也寸步為艱;可是後來他醒覺,若先把自己改變,家人就會受感動而改變,透過家人的支持和鼓勵,說不定他能改變他的國家。這個醒覺,就像伊索寓言其中一則「北風和太陽」的道理 (Persuasion is better than force / 勸說往往比強迫更有效)。

常說的「人不能改變世界,只能改變自己來遷就世界」實在太令人沮喪。從上述的智慧可知,我們應該理解「遷就」是「間接改變」的一途。撫心自問,近年我的心態真是老化了,游過幾個漩渦後,逐漸培養成依賴外力改變自己的習慣,像花瓣落在流水之上。我應該主動改變自己,再上戰場才是!

後話:

關於這段墓誌銘,應由 1999年 Jim Clemmer 出版的 “Growing the Distance ( ISBN 0-9684675-0-4, p78)” 首先引述。在網上找了很久,也找不到這著名的墓誌銘半張相片。根據資料,那個無名墓碑擁有者,是一名死於公元 1100 的聖公會主教 (Anglican Bishop)。由於聖公會後來才成立,加上主教不是應該獨身的嗎,為甚麽會有家庭?疑點重重呢。 管它,只要道理說得對就可以了。

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About 帆
某個第五型人的部落格。

8 Responses to 來,改變自己!

  1. brownie says:

    家庭不一定指結婚和子女喎…

  2. l.minor says:

    想改變人,真係難難難

    其實都唔錯吖~先改變自己,好多野都會自然地改變

  3. 火羽 says:

    「人不能改變世界,只能改變自己來遷就世界」實在太令人沮喪。–>同感. 事情永遠是雙向, 而且充滿彈性. 所以呢, 不要灰心~ 一定有合適自己, 正如我能適應不同城市生活~

    • 平帆 says:

      來自黑洞的訊息!

      謝謝鼓勵。或許我以往碰到太多高牆(單向的人),所以有一種無力感。我要試試轉頭再找出路。

  4. 五珍 says:

    改變自己,影響別人﹗

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